this was actually written a couple of weeks ago, but never published. I have been too busy to write, or read much so I thought I could throw this one out. Have a great day!
It’s Saturday morning. The sun isn’t even up and I’m driving around a 40,000 pound vehicle, totally empty. I would so much rather be home in my warm bed. It’s frigid with the windchill. I thought spring was here, but I was as mistaken as that damned groundhog. 2014 has the never ending winter. I feel like I’m living in an episode of “Game of Thrones”. Any moment a white walker will stroll out of the distance.
Let me clarify: I am not writing while driving. Bus routes are timed to pick people up. Any time that you aren’t stopping to pick up, you get ahead of schedule. If the bus arrives at the stop early, the passengers may not have made it out yet. “An early bus is no bus” as the employer says in discipline letters and other propaganda. So as I sit at a layover point, I write stuff that I think about.
I’m actually quite pissed today. A member of the supervisory staff divulged some private, personal information about me. The main reason I’m pissed is that the information was not factual. This guy tried to be a union guy and he wasn’t really smart enough so he switched teams. He couldn’t keep confidential information when he was on our side.
Life is a power struggle. You try to do well at your job. We all have relationships. When I say relationship, I’m not talking about couples. If you go to Starbucks to get a coffee several times a week and the “barista” or whatever they call them, makes small talk, you have created a relationship. It is not substantial, or significant, but they start to form an opinion of you. Through small talk you can learn about marital status, job, kids or not, pet lover and so much more. I learned a long time ago as a bus driver to guard what I say.
I had a regular, but sporadic passenger. One day he got on and the first thing he says, “How are your kids?” Let me backtrack; I know this guy lives in a halfway house. It is specifically geared to sex offenders. Sometime before I knew that, I must have told him, through small talk that I had kids. He remembered.
I am a leader in my workplace. I am generally well liked. I am also venomously despised. The people that hate, supported my opponent in the election, or I couldn’t reverse their discipline. Some think union folks just don’t want to work. They see the events I attend and are jealous. Meanwhile, I was the only one of 3 or 4 willing to attend.
I’m not sure where I’m trying to go with this. Just random shit from my head. I’m now home and going out with some very good friends. I just always try to be cognoscente of the impression I create in others. I’m still getting used to this more public role and it’s a far cry from other jobs I’ve had. If I joke around during a discipline meeting, I am judged. Sometimes it’s ok, but most times it’s not. I really want them all to like me, but I am accepting the fact that probably only 20 percent do, 60 percent are indifferent, 10 percent dislike and 10 percent more would destroy me if they could. Such is the price we pay for the choices we make. Life is political no matter how much you think differently.